Getting married as a virgin without mincing words is honourable, commendable and one of the best gift a woman can present to her husband on their wedding night. So, for those who are still virgins, PLEASE be purposeful and ask God to help you keep it until your wedding night. It is honourable and pleasing to God.
Now to the crux of the matter, I do not hold anything against the young woman who took to social media to announce that she was deflowered by her husband on their wedding night. If you ask me, I will say she earned the bragging right. In a time when morals are drastically dwindling, this sort of news gives one the hope that morals and values can still be kept and savoured.
My problem however is the intent of the post. The message itself seem rather spiteful and to an extent scornful. You will agree with me that the couple had this all planned out from the onset. It can be inferred from the images posted that the husband and wife left their very first copulation as a couple to take pictures for validation on Social Media. Again I ask you what end?
The questions that plagues my mind are these: was the blood stained pictures even necessary in the first place? The answer for me is NO. Was that post made to encourage those who are still virgins to hold on irrespective of the pressure and challenges?The answer is NO. Was the same post made to intimate others on how to flee youthful lust and remain chaste until they are married? The answer is still NO. The tone of the post in itself is arrogant and dissing.
In as much as she earned the bragging right, I think the blood stains should have been exclusively reserved for some family members and very close friends to create the effect she wants. But all of that on the media space? Anyway, like someone said “na jealousy dey worry all of us wey no support this post.” For emphasis sake, the post itself is not bad. What is the motive?
I know it takes discipline to keep one’s virginity BUT it takes GOD more to keep it. Do you know why I said God? Some persons have also desired it but they were either abused or involved in one accident or the other that deprived them of fulfilling that wish. As much as keeping your virginity until marriage is Gold, do not forget that it cannot keep your marriage. As you keep your virginity, purpose in your heart to have a good character – that is what in addition to your precious gift can keep your marriage, of course with the Grace of God.
My point is even when we have bragging right to a thing we should brag in the context of leaving a lesson to be learned by others to achieve even more. We should without obscurity lead others through the path to overcoming obstacles and challenges on their way to attaining that feat.
Lastly, strive not just to remain a virgin until marriage but also be sexually pure because you can be sexually inactive but not sexually pure.
Esther Okoi writes from Calabar
